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Opinions Are Like . . . (But Isn’t Mine Right?)

Recently, I did something I rarely do; I posted a YouTube video and some other articles about the Covid-19 situation on my personal and author Facebook pages.

 

Typically, I avoid posting about hot-button issues. I stick to pictures of my grandkids, photos I take of nature and sunsets, and a weekly link to my website. So, to say I got some “reaction” about the YouTube video would be an understatement. Some loved what I posted; others, not-so-much.

 

 

Believe me; I understand that everyone has opinions, and there are a lot of strong opinions out there about the pandemic. 

 

And it’s okay that you have passionate personal opinions. Really. As Shaquille O’Neal once said, “Opinions are like belly buttons: Everybody has one.” (Of course, a guy that big and tough could be wrong, and I’d never tell him so.)

 

 

But Shaq is right. If you’re breathing, you have feelings, thoughts, ideas, and opinions about a lot of things. Welcome to America! Land of the free. Home of the brave, and platform for free speech. Isn’t it remarkable that you can share what you think about anything and everything and not fear being arrested? I love our country.

 

That being said, I was surprised by the rancor and harshness of some who reacted to my pandemic post. Indeed, no one has to agree with me, but I have the right to my beliefs and opinions too, and I shouldn’t have to wear body armor when I share something.

 

Sadly, however, here’s the attitude of too many in our culture: You’re an idiot if you don’t agree with me! 

 

Granted, you might be smarter, better educated, and more well-read than I, but there’s never a place for arrogance or meanness in our relationships.

 

I’ve said it often; you can be right, but if you’re not relational, you’re wrong. (Jesus made loving our neighbor the second greatest commandment—even when they’re wrong.)

 

Here’s another personal opinion: Any relationship based solely on the agreement of opinions is a weak relationship.

 

On the contrary, a healthy relationship is built on far more than merely agreeing with each other about everything. Healthy relationships are built on a choice to love others even when they’re unlovely and wrong.

 

We can disagree. We can vocalize our views. We can—and should—speak the truth to one another, but we must always do so in love. We shouldn’t ever treat anyone with vile and hateful ugliness—not if we want to be like Jesus.

 

You have an opinion. I have an opinion. Good. Great. Got it! But we fail relationally—and miserably so—when we use our convictions as an assault weapon against another human being. (A human created in the image of God and priceless to Him, by the way.)

 

Here’s what love sounds like: “I think I’m right, and you’re wrong, but I will not let my potential rightness become a barrier in our relationship. You matter more to me than that.”

 

The Apostle Paul said, “It doesn’t matter what I say, or how eloquent or profoundly I say it, if I don’t have love, I come off as an annoying gong—just an irritating noise” (1 Cor. 13:1, Bubna paraphrase).

 

So, form opinions. Hold dearly to your strong beliefs. Tell others and post away. It’s all fine and dandy, but please don’t allow your need to be right to blow up your far greater need (and biblical mandate) to be relational.

 

Love. First. Foremost. Always. 

 

For the record, aren’t you glad God chose to love you and me while we were still wrong?

 

I am.

 

Love is large and incredibly patient.

Love is gentle and consistently kind to all.

It refuses to be jealous s when blessing comes to someone else.

Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance.

Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor.

Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense.

1 Corinthians 13:4-5 (TPT)

Kurt Bubna

Kurt W. Bubna has published seven books, is an internationally recognized blogger, conference and retreat speaker, as well as an experienced life and leadership coach. Bubna has over forty years of experience working with individuals, teams, and a wide variety of business and non-profit organizations.

This Post Has 14 Comments

    1. KurtBubna

      Thank you! Hope you are well.

  1. Laura Morford

    I get so sad about the way people disagree! If you don’t have anything nice to say be quiet. Thank you Kurt for putting this into words!

    1. KurtBubna

      As my mom used to say, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything.” Good advice. Thanks for the kind words, Laura.

  2. Dan Waud

    I appreciated the video as well. I checked it with statistics posted on-line and found it to be factually accurate. The conclusions to which the speaker came were, of course, his conclusions. Not being an epidemiologist, I have to say I wouldn’t know how to even vet those opinions. However, he did have a reasoned and gracious approach, and he was willing to subject his research and conclusions to questioning.
    I am blessed by your wisdom and kindness, Kurt, and I thank you for your gentle reminder to love my neighbor, even the one with that political candidate sign in his yard, as myself.

    1. KurtBubna

      Hi Dan, Always good to hear from you! Thank you for the gracious response and for adding to the conversation here. You are loved!

  3. Sharon Hughson

    Love this so much. I wish people would stop trying to pound their “rightness” into others. All that does is drive them further away from that viewpoint (and if it IS right, that’s sad).
    Thanks for being willing to put yourself out there and talk about this hot-button topic. I’m happy to keep my opinions to myself:)

    1. KurtBubna

      Thank YOU, Sharon. I sincerely appreciate the encouragement.

  4. Doug Fisher

    Thanks Kurt for your very thoughtful blog. I agree with Carol. we are no longer in a place where freedom of speech is allowed.
    It seems that it is “My way or the highway” mentality. God is love. God is truth. We must all speak the truth in love. God bless.
    Doug

    1. KurtBubna

      Sad, but true, Doug. Sometimes the people who say they value tolerance are very intolerant of others who don’t agree with them. Thank you for your kind words.

  5. Gwen Meldrum

    Kurt, I continue to be in awe of your gift to be real, to be human, and to use your humanity to bring people to know God and his love! Thank you! ❤️

    1. KurtBubna

      Hi Gwen, humbled, honored, blessed by your kindness. Have a wonderful day. You are loved.

  6. Carol King

    I so appreciated that you posted the video – whether I agree with it, or not. I worked at a University for over 26 years and to me it seems like education is moving more from a place of learning to a place of indoctrination. Like you, that is just my opinion . . . but I was raised to research everything from good sources and then to make my own decision. I’m not sure people do that these days. It is critical we all research and learn from a variety of solid and verified sources, not just one, or God forbid, from the press or FB. America has become so polarized and it breaks my heart. We all have a right to our opinions and should not have accursing fingers pointing at us for feeling or saying what is in our hearts and minds. People are becoming fearful of speaking out because they are afraid of exactly what happened to you. I’m sorry you had to endure that but not sorry you are speaking out. God bless you. We need more true faith based leaders at this time in our history, not people who are trying to lead by fear and division.

    1. KurtBubna

      Hi Carol, thank you so much for adding to the conversation. I appreciate and agree with your insights. You are loved!

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